Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Randomize