The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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