he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
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