Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
