Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
