Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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