Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize