Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
