matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
