Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
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