I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
