Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
