My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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