508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
