The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
