Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
