Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
