Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Randomize