i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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