Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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