You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
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no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
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Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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