Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
sarcasm needs its own font
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize