Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Randomize
