dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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