Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Randomize