You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Randomize
