I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
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