she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
COCAINE IS GR8
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
