I want to make a zoo with you.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize
