i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
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