no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
How does it feel to date your dad?
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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