It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
