Hey man sorry I got all grabby
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Found the puke drawer
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Randomize
