I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.