so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
