wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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