I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Randomize
