I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
