would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
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