czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
