Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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