how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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