Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
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do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
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Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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