girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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