What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
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