Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
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