Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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