I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
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