Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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