i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
I love you.
Bad choice
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize