After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
All the doctor said was why
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Randomize
