I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Randomize
