yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
